Featured

What power does

Let’s cut to the chase: Yesterday was horrifying. We are long past the time of mincing words. This blog is supposed to be about navigating adulthood, and unfortunately in the current era that means facing, processing, and responding to events that shouldn’t be occurring.

On the off chance you missed it, yesterday insurrectionists stormed the U.S. Capitol building. All members of Congress had to be evacuated, and it delayed the Senate’s electoral college proceedings to confirm the presidential election results. A pipe bomb was found (and defused) at the RNC headquarters a few blocks away, and at least one other explosive was neutralized. At least four people died. The National Guard was called in. Want to know the last time the Capitol was successfully invaded and taken? The War of 1812.

The United States was founded upon — and clings to — democratic ideals, including and especially free and fair elections*. When a contingency of violent civilians invades the seat of federal power for the express purpose of overturning certified election results, it’s not a protest. It’s domestic terrorism.

To make matters worse, these attitudes and behaviors have been stoked, incited, and in some cases praised by the sitting president. This is entirely unconscionable and inexcusable. Enabling sedition cannot be tolerated. When law enforcement responds more forcefully to people marching in the streets to assert that Black lives matter than it does to insurrectionists trying to destabilize the federal government, there is no longer room for conversation about “bad apples.” These events are part and parcel a result of the central sin of the United States: the corrupting force of power, especially nationalism and white supremacy.

As someone who was in the first grade when 9/11 happened, I have never been more concerned about the sustainability of our democratic system than I was yesterday.

The difficult part of course, is that the average citizen has limited efficacy to enact change or protect the ideals we believe the country stands for. Here’s what you can do:

  • Vote. Because, as the past few months have shown, it really does matter. Local and smaller scale elections can be even more important than federal elections, and your vote goes event further.
  • Call your representative. Congresspeople and senators are, when it comes down to it, public servants. Hold them accountable for how they legislate and how they respond to critical events happening locally and nationally by calling (emails and letters can also work, but calls are much more effective).
  • Examine where your values do — and more importantly, don’t — line up with your behavior. Care about climate change? Purchase more sustainably. Care about disability services or veterans’ protections? Volunteer and organize. Care about racial justice? Do your research and elevate the learned voices in those communities.
  • Check your sources. Media literacy is more crucial than ever with the rampant misinformation spread across the internet — often by politicians and by people we know. Before you share something, look into whether it’s been verified by multiple sources, who is reporting it, and what biases might be driving the information. We owe good journalists a great deal, and have a responsibility to approach their reporting thoughtfully.
  • Don’t pretend like this is surprising. This pattern of events has played out under authoritarian leadership time and again across the globe. The more aware we are of history and of what goes on outside our borders, the better equipped we are to build a democracy that will not fall prey to the same mistakes again. Spend some time looking into the history of insurrection and protest in the U.S., and what drove the involved parties (happy to provide further reading on this if anyone wants).

I really wanted to write something positive for this week, but I guess in some ways this is. We may be living through a turning point, but it is one we can navigate together. If you’ve got thoughts to share or would like more info/sources, let me know in a comment below or on Twitter @ohgrowup. Thanks for reading.

* Note that this has historically not been the case in practice, hence the need for constitutional amendments, the Voting Rights Act, etc. Even today, many voters are disenfranchised by those in power who would rather suppress citizens’ constitutionally protected rights than risk losing power.

Photo is a stark black background because, while many stunning photos are available from yesterday’s events, a number are somewhat violent and graphic, and/or require permission to use. The links throughout this post offer a number of photos of the unrest.

Advertisement
Featured

Just getting by

Hey y’all. I know I haven’t made a post in a while. Admittedly, it’s not the top priority when it feels like the world is on fire and I’m just trying to feed myself and keep my head on straight.

I don’t know what tomorrow’s going to bring. Really, none of us do. But more stress and turmoil is almost guaranteed.

So today I just wanted to offer some things that can help when life feels like a lot, maybe even too much, to handle.

(If you haven’t voted yet, do that first! Resources here.)

Cover the basics

Have you slept enough? Have you eaten recently? Had a glass of water? Lowered your shoulders? Unclenched your jaw? It’s the little things, really.

Movies & TV

I have a list of comfort movies and TV that I watch when I need to just feel better. Some of my favorites are listed below, but of course there are treasure troves of streaming services out there.

  • Favorite movies: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, The Martian, Pride & Prejudice (2005), The Princess Diaries, The Devil Wears Prada, The Princess Bride
  • Favorite TV: Schitt’s Creek, Brooklyn 99, The Good Place, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Friends

Reading, but make it escapism

I love reading, and usually try to challenge myself to mix in some serious and nonfiction reading between more popcorn fiction picks. But I was recently reading a short story collection that was, how shall we say, not helping. So I put it down for now and picked up a cute rom-com one of my best friends recommended instead. Read something that makes you happy 🙂

Do something with your hands

I go absolutely nuts if I don’t have something to do with my hands. Often that’s just fidgeting, but I also crochet and garden, and even cooking and baking help give my body and mind something to do so I don’t just spiral.

Move

If you can, go for a run, take a walk, or do some yoga — anything that gets your whole body moving and some endorphins flowing.

Breathe

I hate how often I forget this one. You can try a number of techniques, and I’ve found a few especially helpful

  • Square breathing. Breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, out for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, repeat.
  • Belly breathing. Breathe in deeply, filling your whole belly with air, then your chest. Exhale slowly, letting air leave your chest first, and finally your belly. Repeat.
  • Literally just take 10 deep breaths (slowly).

Music

I put together this playlist to help when I’m feeling crappy, especially if I’m anxious. You might have your own playlist or album that you turn to, but there’s a lot of comfort to be found in a familiar melody.

I know all of this isn’t much to offer, but sometimes adulting is just getting by. What helps you out when life gets overwhelming? Let me know in a comment below or on Twitter @ohgrowup. Thanks for reading, and know that you’re not alone in this.

Photo is a free stock photo because, well, this is life right now.

Get out the vote

Congratulations! You’re an adult. Part of being an adult means taking part in shaping your government, which in most places starts with voting. Please note, I do not just mean picking any old bubble to fill in to say that you voted, and I do not mean only voting during major elections like presidential ones. Being a responsible voter means making sure you’re registered, researching issues and candidates, and voting.

There are a lot of responsibilities that come with being an adult. It can be easy for this one to slip through the cracks, but when that happens we give up our voice in a system that — though far from perfect — is perhaps our best opportunity to change our world and create our future.*

So today I’ve got some solutions to common roadblocks that keep people from voting, because those shouldn’t get in your way.**

The Basics

If you want a refresher on how the voting system works in the U.S., the official U.K. Parliament YouTube channel has the best quick summary video I’ve found (weird, but it works).

There are votes for federal, state, county, and city/town positions and measures. The nice thing is they’re all in one spot on your ballot, but you may need to go to different spots to research them.

If you want more government and voting info, PBS has a whole series of crash course videos that break down different topics.

Registering

Do you know if you’re registered to vote? (It’s okay if you don’t, I had to double check that I was.) If you’re not sure, click here to find out. Note that registration deadlines are coming up — if you live in California like me, the registration deadline is tomorrow!

Oops, turns out you’re not registered. Where do you go to do that? There’s a spot on most state and county websites for it, but this page on the federal government’s website can direct you to most of them.

Okay, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to show up in-person. Y’all I am a permanent vote-by-mail voter. You can also request a one-time absentee ballot. Just make sure to check the dates that it needs to be requested and postmarked (aka mailed) by so your vote is sure to count. Here’s a quick guide on the rules in different states.

Researching

I’m registered, but don’t know any of these candidates or issues. Cool! Me neither! I was going over my ballot recently and don’t know anything about a lot of these things I get to vote for. That’s where the research starts.

  • You can find your state’s voter information guide online (here is the one for California)
  • You can search by candidate or issue (clicking through a few links on Google can do wonders)
  • This only works for measures, but if you read through most of the detail on a measure or proposition, there’s actually a lot of information — and sometimes it’s buried
  • You can look at party websites for perspectives. I honestly won’t vote on an issue before reading what Democrats and Republicans think about it. I don’t ever let party determine my vote, but the reasons each side provides can illuminate more about the topic
  • If possible, see if anywhere says who’s funding it. This is a huge deal, and particular corporate or organizational endorsements can be a big clue as to what’s really driving a candidate or measure
  • Ask around. I often talk measures or candidates over with my parents and a couple close friends to get another perspective. Absolutely no one can tell you how to vote, but sometimes they have valuable insight

I’ve done my research, and I don’t like any of the candidates for this position. Sorry, bro. Unfortunately, sometimes that happens. You can choose to not vote on a particular measure or position (even if you do vote on the others), or you can pick the lesser of two evils. There’s also usually a write-in candidate option, but Donald Duck hasn’t won any elections yet.

Actually voting

Make sure you know the deadline! For California, it’s June 5 this year. Find out when your ballot is due here.

Okay cool, but like where do I show up? Click here to find your closest polling place, and make sure to check the hours!

Know your rights. This is so important! Here are the most pressing need-to-knows:

  • If you’re in line when the polling place closes, they still have to let you vote
  • You may need to show ID, but every state is different. Click here to find out what’s required.
  • As long as you’re 18 by election day, you can vote
  • You can be homeless and still meet the residency requirements to vote
  • If you have any sort of disability or language barrier, you can choose someone to assist you in the voting booth (as long as that person is not your employer, an agent of your employer, or an officer or agent of your union)
  • You can ask folks at the polling place to help you as well
  • You can fill out a sample ballot ahead of time and bring that in with you to make things easier (or any other piece of paper). If you were registered to vote a month or more ahead of your election, you should be automatically mailed one. If you weren’t, you can usually request one from your local county website
  • You do not have to tell anyone how you voted, nor is anyone allowed to demand you vote a particular way. Period.

I’m really proud and honored to live somewhere where I — as a mixed-race, non-land owning, unmarried woman — am able to vote. We have an imperfect, sometimes frustrating system, but voting is one of the most important ways we can take part in improving it. A lot of our ancestors and fellow citizens paid with their voices, minds, bodies, and lives to make sure we could. Let’s honor that by voting, and by voting responsibly. The future’s counting on us.

Did I miss anything? Let me know in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and let’s go get out the vote!

 

*A lot of this is U.S.-centric, so I apologize if you live in a different country and this doesn’t prove as helpful. But to the best of my understanding many similar principles apply and comparable resources exist, so a little digging should provide the info you might need.

**I’ve tried to make this as nonpartisan as possible, but some of the links provided may seem to lean either conservative or liberal. I do not post them as a party, candidate, or measure endorsement, but only because they had the most thorough information I could find. Always look at both sides, and think with both your head and your heart.